People and groups in organisations often hold differing views but still need each other's co-operation. They may differ about: -
Goals or what should be done
Roles or who should do what
Procedures or how people should work together
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Relationships or how people should relate to each other
Good managers manage these conflicts when they interfere with the achievement of the organisation's mission. They work to clarify goals, then roles, and then procedures. Most interpersonal issues disappear when the goals, roles and procedures are clear.
When in a conflict, listen, summarise the other's position and express your own thoughts and feelings clearly and directly. Use short sentences that start "I ....". If you manage two people who are in conflict, help them listen to each other and create their own solution. This is much more likely to stick than one you impose.
Styles of conflict handling
In any conflict situation, think about the relationship between the parties and the importance of the issue to you. The style you adopt will depend on the balance between these factors.
Relationship is important
Issue is unimportant
Style is "Smoothing"
The animal is
A Teddy Bear who wants to be liked
The risk is being exploited
This approach can be lose/win |
Relationship is important
Issue is important
Style is "Confronting"
The animal is
An Owl who wants the best solution for all
The risk is being exhausted
This approach can be win/win |
|
Relationship is unimportant
Issue is unimportant
Style is "Withdrawing"
The animal is
A Tortoise who wants peace and quiet
The risk is being bored
This approach can be lose/lose |
Relationship is unimportant
Issue is important
Style is "Forcing"
The animal is
A Shark who wants to win
The risk is being sabotaged later
This approach can be win/lose |
People often prefer to use some styles more than others. However, each situation may require a different style. You can use all of them as required.
For further reading , "Caring enough to Confront" by David Augsberger, ISBN 0-8307-0733-6, 1981 is very good.
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